turn it down

Like the storms that roll through the southeast, sometimes I get a cloud of thoughts that just won’t seem to go away. You hope they’ll pass by quick, but sometimes they’ll linger. Trying to figure out how to remain in the clear is another thing entirely.

One thing that doesn’t work for me is frustratingly crying out “JUST STOP”. It always upsets me even more and makes me feel like I’m out of control. Like in some way that’s really supposed to work and I’m doing something wrong because it’s not working.

Music helps. Music has always been the way to focus my mind into one singular lane. No matter what was going on in my life, I could throw in my headphones and everything else would fade away. But once the headphones come out, the thoughts are still there, waiting.

Something I learned recently was to think of my thoughts as clouds. I could look up and see them there, but I didn’t have to interact with them. I could just let them pass by. I just have to remember to do that because when I do remember, it works pretty well.

Then there’s writing about it. As available as paper and pen is to me, I don’t have the same release as I do when typing. It’s been frustrating not being able to lately. Maybe that’s why all my emotions and thoughts have bottlenecked. They’ve just been stuck here gathering weight.

So here I am. Typing up a post on my phone. You gotta do what you’ve gotta do! Hope you all can clear your minds easy tonight.


2 thoughts on “turn it down

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